In most divorces, one spouse is caught off guard by the delivery of divorce papers. That is why it pays, to pay attention to warning signs your marriage may riddled with problems that could cause you to end up in divorce court.
Getting comfortable with the status quo and taking things for granted is one of the biggest mistakes married couples make. Below is a list of warning signs of a marriage in trouble.
Happily Ever After
A successful marriage can be sweeter than any sugar. But sometimes it seems like it can turn sour without out of the blue. Without warning, what you thought was a great relationship can suddenly turn south
As it turns out, there are warning signs that your relationship is in danger. If you take a closer look at what’s going on, you might be able to spot the trouble areas – and fix them before it’s too late. If your partner says any of the following items, listen up! It could be a symptom that all is not well.
#1) ‘I’m Bored’
When you’re married, you’re in it for the long haul. You can expect there to be ebbs and flows in the excitement level of your relationship. But if you’re partner is constantly complaining about feeling stuck in a rut, there might be something there to explore. Do you end up doing the same things all the time? Does your relationship routine feel stuck?
Bring The Excitement Back
In marriage (and anything else in life for that matter), you can’t expect things to go perfectly without doing anything. You have to keep on creating that spark and magic. If your partner complains about being bored, it’s time to do something out of the ordinary to reignite that old flame!
#2) ‘You Don’t Understand Me’
Listening is vital in a healthy marriage. And if your partner complains about not being understood, try to hear what they’re saying. Lack of good communication can disintegrate a marriage faster than sugar dissolves in water – but you won’t be left with something sweet.
Hear Your Partner
Sometimes men and women have different views on the same situation. Try to look at the situation from your partner’s viewpoint. Once you walk in their shoes for a little bit, you’ll be able to understand where they’re coming from.
Young happy couple talking together outdoor – sitting on grass
Factors That Can Lead to Unfaithfulness
Looking for ego boosts outside your marriage. Men tend to turn to extramarital liaisons to build up their self-image or sexual self-esteem. Women are suspect to affairs to satisfy their longing for love, appreciation and tenderness. Beware of leaning on others beyond your marriage as primary sources for love, value and respect.
Neglecting to talk openly with each other. If you only talk to your spouse about the bills and household chores, you may be sliding into trouble. Holding in your thoughts and feelings does not enhance transparency in your relationship. Practice the art of small talk that can open the door to deeper sharing.
Resisting conflict resolution. Every couple runs into communication rough spots. It’s important not to build walls between you and your spouse. Some people mask their hurt while others spew their emotions. Neither method is constructive. Both ways create relational roadblocks. Unresolved conflict leads to isolation and leaves you vulnerable to fleeing your marriage.
Discounting fun and relaxation together. Think of the last time you and your spouse enjoyed a date or a weekend getaway together. As the old adage says, “Couples that play together, stay together.” If career, family and home responsibilities are crowding out laughter and friendship with your spouse, you need to book in some recreational retreats with each other.
Increasing the time you spend apart. The demands of work travel, ill children or differing interests and hobbies are common issues that can keep couples apart. The more time you spend away from your spouse, the greater temptation to drift in your relationship.
Allowing daily stresses and fatigue to sabotage your intimacy. Packed schedules and raising children are two common reasons husbands and wives feel ho-hum in their relational intimacy. Romance, in an instant, can remind you of the reasons you love each other. All marriages require times of refreshing and an in-depth look at intimacy saboteurs.
Letting your love life fizzle instead of sizzle. Familiarity and boredom can creep into any marriage. Beware of shaking things up in your sex life by dumping your spouse for another more promising lover. If you or your partner suddenly is disinterested in sex with each other, be sure to explore the true reasons.
Giving in to predictability. A little mystery can go a long way in adding spice to your marriage. Many couples succumb to affairs out of fading interest in their spouses. One way to continue your wedded bliss is to surprise your mate with love notes or an occasional unexpected outing or gift.
Living in denial. Pretending that problems do not exist in your marriage will only widen the gap between you and your spouse. Many extramarital affairs start when a frustrated spouse searches for a reality check in marriage by turning to an officemate or friend of the opposite sex for support. Dare to face the truth of your marital struggles.
Forgetting your commitment to each other. Over time couples are prone to forget why they fell in love. In our easy-come-easy-go culture, it takes courage and determination to honor commitment instead of convenience.
Failing to resist come-ons and temptations. In our over-sexed world, even the most innocent husband or wife can fall prey to sexual temptations. Before you or your mate find yourself in compromising situations, talk about safeguards for your marriage. You may need to avoid after-work soirees, certain hotels on business trips and sexually compromising magazines, movies or television shows. Thinking “Just this once,” can lead to a lifetime of regret.